30 August 2014

the time is here

time to leave the green of The Netherlands
and the ease and comfort
of the Western world
now the adventure truly begins

Zambia and Malawi
here we come


25 August 2014

not mine

time is all at once
too fast, too slow
I have not yet adjusted
to the new truth
that time is not my own
it never was
thoughts that I possessed
anything at all
were mere illusion
more stones to drop
slipping through loose fingertips
not to leave a trail to follow back
but simply to release excess
weight or ties that hinder

every bit I let go of
teaches me
how vast the store
still in my grasping
hands and heart
enough to sink a spirit 
yearning to float 

joining Kelli where the rhythms are His alone


24 August 2014


hearts are cracking
opening fresh, wild
ready to draw in more
tears and smiles
mingle, how privileged
are we to watch
as God moves nations

Halfway into the Global Orientation Conference
we are surrounded by those much younger than us
the other night we sang Hosanna
I see a generation
rising up to take their place
with selfless faith
and I journalled:

Last night I sensed that You plan to use us as examples for the generation following us. How best can we do that Lord?

obedience and surrender
they will see your willing spirit
when you die to self with joy
they will see how you love
when you allow yourself
to be moved by the wind of My Spirit
they will learn how to dance with Me
step by step, breath by breath

22 August 2014

not by might

this morning's quiet time - listening:

So he said to me, 
“This is the word of the Lord to Zerubbabel: 
‘Not by might nor by power, but by my Spirit,’ says the Lord Almighty. 

My power
My faith
My courage working in you
You need not strive
or worry
or ponder plans
but give in, simply, totally
and I will have My way
for it is not what you do
but what I have already done

time slows
and spins
at My command
yet has now no power
in the context of eternity
breathe in the release of that truth
acknowledge your total lack
of control
and in that, find your peace
and so remain
in the vine


21 August 2014

sunny afternoon

for a time after lunch today
the Dutch clouds parted
and we took a walk on the grounds
in the warm sunshine
finding flowers
and penned animals
a chance to stretch, walk and be quiet
now back to the busyness
of the Conference

20 August 2014

quiet time

Our first quiet time of the OM Global Orientation Conference and I realized my cheeks were wet - I opened my journal to ask:

Why the tears Lord? Joy? Relief? Awe?

He didn't leave me to ponder long, but quickly answered.

All, little one.
And the tears are sweet to Me.
In the rush and go you have felt alone
our time alone disturbed
but I Was - I Am  - I Will Be
always with you
So now again
let Me be your centre.
I have pulled every string.
This is My orchestra
and the music shall play on.

Thank you for following, for singing along
even when you do not know the words
this is part of your lessons
ongoing lessons in surrender
and I accept your tears, your sacrifice.

As you bow low
it is easier for Me to lift you
why struggle to walk
when I can carry you
Then in My power
you stand, and move
and I breathe in and through you
for the glory of My Own Name.

You will say
what you cannot say
and you will do
more than you can do
because I Am
and I can
and the world will know

So welcome home child
ever in My care
take your comfort, peace and strength here
what ever felt lost shall be found
time has not been wasted

With each new sun
we have only just begun
like a feast set out before you
take each moment
as you allow Me to have all of you
you allow yourself to take in all of Me

Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptably with reverence and awe,  for our “God is a consuming fire.”
Hebrews 12:28-29 NIV


17 August 2014

spring forth

Do not [earnestly] remember the former things; 
neither consider the things of old. 
Behold, I am doing a new thing! 
Now it springs forth; 
do you not perceive and know it 
and will you not give heed to it? 
I will even make a way in the wilderness 
and rivers in the desert.

the river runs
and time wings
days,months and years
of dreams and plans
have stopped here
this very moment

feet long planted
will not step, but leap
into the new thing

we carry your love
close in our hearts
thanking God 
remembering you 
always in our prayers


16 August 2014

no hurry hurry

Hurry, hurry has no blessings
Swahili proverb

let me find blessings
in the waiting
the slow
as God's sun sets
on the Canadian prairies
soon to rise
on the African plains

Sandra Heska King - Still Saturday
looking for a still space with Sandy


14 August 2014

holding Canada close

one of the things that drew me
to the lake
was the opportunity
to drink in the sight
and sounds
of our common loons
at once peaceful and eerie
a wailing song of Canada
I allowed it to saturate
my heart, deep
anther bit of home
to carry on my journey


13 August 2014

in and out

we spent a day and
a night and
a day
at the lake
to rest, refresh
receive prayer, hospitality
and too much food
more memories to file

my time here
in this little online space
is brief and precious
I am in
and out
and in again
as life moves on


09 August 2014

between breaths

the most important thing 
in a whole day 
is the rest we take 
between two deep breaths,
or the turning inwards in prayer 
for five short minutes
Etty Hillesum

stop along the road
pause, pray, praise
find the centre
breathe in beauty
before continuing on

Sandra Heska King - Still Saturday
finding the stillness with Sandy


07 August 2014

more goodbyes

I wrote here
when we gave final kisses, belly rubs
and words of farewell
to our sweet dog two weeks ago

two nights ago, Rick dismantled
his aquarium, gifting it and all the fish
to a younger relative

just a part of the series of goodbyes
that we are walking into
and through

the hummingbirds still hover
at feeders that will remain
to be filled with nectar
by the family soon 
to be renting our house

and the cats, three adults
two sets of three kittens
black and white all
will remain, another part of us
roaming the acres, taking refuge
in the barn

things will continue
here, in our absence even if
it feels a bit unsettling
to hand our lives over
to others

all this, and we haven't yet
begun the real work
of saying goodbye to
loved ones

eleven days and counting
the time is

Velvet Ashes: encouragement for women serving overseas

sharing at The Grove at Velvet Ashes


05 August 2014


our last days here are wild
sweet like the clover
blooming in full fragrance
I am intoxicated
dizzy with the collecting
of sights, scents
hungry to hold and file
tastes of home
I can pack them, weight free
in my heart, where soon
they will blend
with all that is new
a fusion only The Master
Himself could brew

joining Kelli living in unforced rhythms


02 August 2014


dive in
to each moment
allow time
to remain liquid
free to move
as you find your 
quiet place
don't rush
He's got this

Sandra Heska King - Still Saturday
seeking the stillness with Sandy


01 August 2014


This weeks prompt at The Grove was hindsight
Danielle writes to a younger version of herself, newly arrived on the mission field and then asks us:
In hindsight, that’s what I’d tell my fresh-off the plane self.  What would you tell yours?
Since we are still two weeks from departure, I'll have to put a bit of a reverse twist on the question, speaking back from the future that hasn't yet arrived.


big gulps of the fresh Canadian prairie air
take it in deep, pause
now exhale, let it all go
relax into the spin
the swirling rush, the imaginings
soon enough your eyes will see
ears hear, what you have only dreamed of
don't lose your last home moments
to worries of what you can not now know
your new life will have troubles of its own
unfolding in their own time
as will the blessings
you will weep
you will laugh
you will stand in awe
and you will be changed
breathe, pause, let it go
make room for all He has to give

Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now, and don’t get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes. Matthew 6:34 The Message

Velvet Ashes: encouragement for women serving overseas

joining in the conversation at The Grove at Velvet Ashes