cracks exposed

we have all been shattered

in ways we can't yet comprehend

and perhaps will not understand

until the day we look into His eyes

the One who collects every shard

to rebuild His beloved creation

torn apart by the ways of man

it is our brokenness

that both sets us apart

and unites us

if we could lay down the burden

the heavy weight of trying to hide 

the cracks and bruises

and see them instead

as holy places

waiting to be healed

accepting His mark, scarred 

but shining for His glory

Going through the motions doesn't please you,

    a flawless performance is nothing to you.

I learned God-worship

    when my pride was shattered.

Heart-shattered lives ready for love

    don’t for a moment escape God’s notice

Psalm 51:16-17 The Message

breathing in the whitespace with Bonnie 

writing a life

in posts and tweets and status reports

it seems that more and more

of those I know, are writing books

in my honesty, transparency

I admit, here

that my heart stings, aches

turns toward envy

then, yes, then

I console myself with this --

they are writing books

but I am not still

I am writing a life

I have grown accustomed

to much time alone

to breathe, expand

ponder and play with words

now time rushes past me

filled with the tasks

of living my word for 2014

prepare

soon, in the blink of an eye

I will transition yet again

from preparation

to actualization

as we step into our new life

my heart both races ahead

and lags behind

and words will come 

when they will

joining Bonnie in a small act of creation

 

splintered

I am not now, can never be

perfect, yet over 

and again I am reminded

comforted by His Words

it is not wholeness

He desires, no

it is the splintering

shards, the cracking

broken heart of me

Going through the motions doesn't please you,

    a flawless performance is nothing to you.

I learned God-worship

    when my pride was shattered.

Heart-shattered lives ready for love

    don't for a moment escape God’s notice.

Psalm 51:16-17 The Message

finding whitespace with Bonnie

Finding Spiritual Whitespace

This post is part of the  “Finding Spiritual Whitespace Blog Tour” which I am a part of, along with a group of soulful, journeying kindreds. To learn more and join us, CLICK HERE!  

I know I'm not the only one who has thought that perhaps life would be easier if we kept our hearts sheltered.

The world around us certainly provides the opportunity to stay so busy that we don't have to listen to the rumblings in our spirit, reminding us that we're hungry for more.

More of what God can provide if we slow down and allow Him entry to all those places we have kept hidden.

I have heard His knock, soft yet persistent

come away, come away

I Am waiting

breathe in the life I offer

free, full, complete

you are never alone

and all that you need

is in Me

together you and I

moment by moment

will create the beauty

that you already are

in the vast quiet space

of My love

Bonnie Gray's wonderful new book Finding Spiritual Whitespace Awakening Your Soul To Rest is part memoir, part workbook and part poetry.  It holds up a mirror for those brave enough to grab the hand of Jesus and take a long, slow look.

As much as you might find yourself captivated by the flow of the words and anxious to read quickly, don't.

This book is meant to be savoured and worked with, not eaten in a few short gulps. Like allowing a chocolate to melt on your tongue, move slowly and allow a conversation to develop and deepen between yourself and the Lover of your soul.

In knowing Him more, you will also find your truest self and in these pages, Bonnie blazes a trail to lead the way.

Bonnie Gray is the writer behind Faith Barista.com who wrote a book about her inspiring, heart-breaking journey to find rest, which garnered Publisher’s Weekly starred review. I’m taking the journey to find rest through this guidebook and invite you to read it too.  You can get a copy HERE.

 

to a younger me

Dearest Karin:

the whole world was waiting for you

those were popular words spoken

and the idea swirled wild

that you could do and be

whoever and whatever you wanted

because, after all

life was all about you

your needs

your desires

your happiness

yet you never seemed to reach

that happy place

because no one ever really told you

where to look

the sweet you craved

turned bitter on your tongue

fullness felt hollow

echoing with dissatisfaction

yes, there is more

and He was there beside you

even when you didn't know

and the whole world is His

and you will learn

that true satisfaction comes

in not being who you want

but in surrender 

to who He needs you to be

moment by moment

day by day

an adventure awaits

beyond your wildest imagining

step in

love, as always,

me

Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, 

and I will listen to you. 

You will seek me and find me 

when you seek me with all your heart.

  Jeremiah 29:12-13 NIV

leaving space with Bonnie

 

below the waves

what if I let go

dropped the reins

took my hands off the wheel

stopped fighting to row or swim against the current

and allowed God to take me downstream?

what if?

could I catch my breath

ease into the flow, relax into His hand?

how much energy am I wasting

trying to keep my head above the water?

while Jesus whispers, again and again

come with me, deeper

even below the waves

I'm here to hold you

and keep you safe

and just when you think

there is no air

breathe in Me

I have been writing here

through a scattering of thunderstorms

blowing in and out, shifting light and dark

and then a rainbow, as if He is saying

remember My promises

all of them

breathing in the whitespace with Bonnie

 

write His name

waves roll

gentle, lacy edges

teasing shore

magnetic energy grounds

me, locked

here, in this moment

watching, waiting

anticipating

as if an answer 

would be etched

upon the sand

wander, where the wetness

creeps, use a big toe

as your pen

write His name, there

FIRE

strong enough to quench

even these waters

there and only

do all answers

cry

finding whitespace along the shore with Bonnie

 

whitespace is not blank

the absence of busy

does not equal nothingness

the absence of busy

is not empty

the busy itself is the vacuum

the energy drain, set fully open

till nothing is left but the busy

no light

no breath

no meaning

just stop, if you can

for a moment

one moment in time

turn off the noise

listen

He has been calling

through the ages

My beloved spoke 

and said to me,

    “Arise, my darling,

    my beautiful one, 

come with me.

Song of Songs 2:10 NIV

in rest, in Him

in long, slow breaths

there is space

to create

to embrace the new thing

He wants to bring forth

through you

through me

to all who would stop

and come

letting go of the busy

to be

renewed

refreshed

restored

His 

work of art

allowing room for whitespace with Bonnie

this is also what we're doing over at Sandy's as we are working through Making Manifest