Shattering

This week snow and frozen water that had filled ditches, loosened, moved away in a rush, leaving a blanket of ice behind, to splinter and hang on branches and reeds. 

My heart too

feels this breaking away

this shattering

edges sharp, fragile

thin enough to be

transparent

yet holding on

with tenacity

this then

is how I choose

to grasp Him

broken, raw, bleeding

surrendered

to His hands

where even pain

reflects light

and He creates

beauty



The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. Psalm 34:18 NIV

Knowing the outcome...

Up in our neck of the woods we see the competition episodes of American Idol on Wednesday evening, but we have to wait until Saturday afternoon to see the result show, instead of Thursday evening like most people.

This morning, while scanning Facebook, I couldn’t avoid comments made by friends that shared the results. I was upset that the mystery had been ruined for me before I had the opportunity to watch the episode myself.

All at once, I could sense God wanted to take the opportunity to speak through my disappointment:

Come on over to The Everyday Testimony Project where I talk about what God shared!

Disturbed but pleasant, randomly

Slate coloured Junco in our yard

Well, since Duane Scott is hinting that this might be the very last Pleasantly Disturbed Thursday I really must jump in with my own random splatterings...

Yesterday, here in my post on Mere Christianity I quoted C. S. Lewis talking about architects not being the walls in the houses they build...

ever since I can not, simply can not get an old Burt Bacarach song out of my head --

A chair is still a chair
Even when there's no one sitting there
But a chair is not a house
And a house is not a home
When there's no one there

Around and around swirl the words, with new questions popping up.

Is a squirrel still a squirrel if the dog doesn't care?
Would they jump from the branches to sit on a chair
if the chair was still a chair?
If I put out a chair
would the juncos sit there
that keep flying about and will perch anywhere?
And what kind of name is junco anyway?
When I hear it I can think only "junk"
and that's not a nice thing to call a bird, is it?

Take a few minutes to visit Duane and add your own form of random and disturbed pleasantry.  Perhaps we can persuade him that these times of silliness are vital to our mental health!

Morning meeting

Daily times spent in communion with Jesus are the most precious moments of my day.  We meet in the stillness of early morning.  I call, He answers.  He knocks, I open the door.  We seek each other with a hunger only true lovers understand.

We are not equal, He and I.  He Is Master, I am slave.  He Is Lord and I am subject.  He Is Teacher and I listen at His feet.

This is what He shared as dawn broke today:

Count the cost.
Count the cost first, then choose the better friend
Me or the world.

Yes, salvation through My blood is a gift freely given
but true life in Me
does not come without a price
My life for yours
your life for Mine

True life in Me
may require a turning away from all you knew before
Yes, all you knew before

The way of the flesh and the Way of the Spirit
at times may follow the same path
but walk carefully, with wisdom
and you will see forks in the road
places of decision
times of turning
yes, even switchbacks
when you'll feel as if you're going backwards

and at each of these forks
again rises the question

"choose you this day whom you will serve"

it is always a choice, child.

Count the cost.
Choose life.
Choose Me.

But if serving the LORD seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your ancestors served beyond the Euphrates, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you are living. But as for me and my household, we will serve the LORD Joshua 24:15 NIV



Jamming with Bonnie today as she asks what Jesus has been teaching us lately.

Large and small

Image via Wikipedia

The smaller Sara Jayne felt in the world, the larger her body became. In food she found flavour and comfort and distraction. When she was frustrated, pretzels, chips and crackers provided crunch and snap and salt. When she was hurting, favourite tastes would numb the pain. When she was bored, there was always something she could do, eat!

When would she be big enough to be noticed? But no one saw her, they only saw the rolls of excess flesh. “If onlys” were the background music of her thoughts. If only I was not so fat then people would like me. If only I was prettier I might find a real boyfriend. If only I had lots of friends it would make my mother happy. The “if onlys” seemed impossible to attain, and thinking about them called forth sadness, and the sadness was swallowed with mouthfuls of more food.

"If only I was smaller, then I would be like everyone else and then I could fit in." The desperate cry of a lonely heart. Perhaps Sara Jayne was never intended to fit in, but to stand out, however she had no understanding of this truth. She only wanted to know what normal felt like. She would lie across her bed and wonder what it would be like to live in a thin body, how different her bones would feel against the mattress, or to walk without her thighs rubbing against each other until the skin was swollen and raw, to be able to run free without feeling the weight of her flesh dragging her toward the ground.

Sara Jayne's spirit was as heavy as her body. There had been nothing that could teach her how to fly.

 
Click over to Emily's to read more imperfect words from the broken and redeemed.

Is a house still a house?

This week Jason and Sarah lead us thru the 4th chapter of Mere Christianity: What Lies Behind the Law.

Here Lewis talks about science's inability to prove or disprove truth about creation.  He speaks of facts, experiments and it all seems to lead to more questions.

If there was a controlling power outside the universe, it could not show itself to us as one of the facts inside the universe - no more than the architect of a house could actually be a wall or staircase or fireplace in that house.

I am attempting to follow Clive's train of thought, but my thoughts wander.  As a believer in One Creator Who Is all and Is in all, I think:

while the wall is not an architect
God Is the wall
the staircase
the flames burning hot
and the fireplace that contains them
He Is the house
and the One who built it.

Somehow I can't help but think that Mr. Lewis would agree.

yet for us there is one God, the Father, of whom are all things, and we for Him; and one Lord Jesus Christ, through whom are all things, and through whom we live.  1 Corinthians 8:6 NKJV

Stop by Jason's Connecting to Impact for more discussion of this weeks chapter.

I Am the wind

The large, long wind chimes that hang from the eaves on the South side of the house have been ringing and moaning loud and low since Sunday evening.  The wind has been steady and strong.  I felt I was to read Romans 8, then I sensed God had something to say about the wind this morning, so I opened my ears and my journal:

Just as the winds have been blowing fierce across your land, do I, by My Spirit, blow across your lives, clearing away the old to prepare the way for the new.

When the gusts are so strong that you feel you will be swept away if you don't hold on to something - remember - all that is created by man is subject to fall, burn, fly away in the wind - so hold on to Me and Me alone.

Yes, this is the threshing floor, little one.  This is the Potter's wheel.  This is the Refiner's fire.

There is more pain in struggle than in surrender.

Trust that I know what I Am creating.

That's why I don't think there's any comparison between the present hard times and the coming good times. The created world itself can hardly wait for what's coming next. Romans 8:18 The Message

It will be for My glory.

An interesting note:

When I had completed my journaling and quiet time, I logged in to the internet, as usual.  I can't count how many references to Romans 8 I encountered in my first few minutes online.  I love when He confirms His Word.